The funeral was today. A short service with the family’s Pastor. A really nice service was held. I was touched by the fact that my uncle had quite a relationship with his Pastor. They knew each other well. The service had so much more depth of meaning because of it. There was prayer and hymns, not my flavor, but then it was not my funeral. I would want Praise music, contemporary! My family would lose hair, I think I’d pick Third Day’s God of Wonders and Chris Tomlin’s How Great is our God with some MercyMe in there too. I said my goodbyes and came home.
I checked my email, because I am alone now. 2/3s of the Boys Club is at work again and the 1/3 is at the beach. In my email was a devotional that confirmed a sensation I had on my way home.
The sensation felt as if I was a bit taller. A bit wiser in my heart of hearts, somehow…I felt a shift within my Spirit and I smiled, not really knowing what was happening within me. Yet, knowing that it would be revealed and soon. I had none of my usual frustration at not being able to decipher what was happening, no nagging questions or concerns. Just a peace that something vital within me was changed, shifted to it’s rightful place.
I thought a bit, and oddly felt beautiful. Imagine. I felt a beauty sweep over me, as if it were a feeling or an emotion. A calm, mature knowing that I was more of who I am supposed to be at that passing moment, and that it would remain. What God put together let no man put asunder…not just a wedding, not just a couple. But a person, a being, a relationship with the Father. What God has put together let no man put asunder.
I want to share a bit of this devotional with you. I encourage you to check this devotional out and subscribe to the devotional. It is amazing to read, it will do your heart good. :
Daily Motivation from A New Thing Ministries
Here is the meat of this particular devotional:
Everywhere I have turned the last couple days I am hearing the same thing; August is the month of new beginnings. Now, I understand we hear these things all the time but I know in my spirit that this one is for real.
How do I know? I am already seeing the effects of it. God had told me a couple days ago that August was the month of new beginnings. Later, I got on my computer and someone had sent me an email of a prophecy that August was a month of new beginnings. Then the Lord spoke this to me; it’s a month of new beginnings, a new season, don’t take any of your old baggage into your new season.
He desires for you to leave the past behind – don’t let the past ruin the future he has for you – let it go. All those hurts and disappointments – let them go. Choose to trust one more time. Believe one more time. Move forward and press into Him one more time.
There is a scripture that says disppointment makes the heart sick but when the promise comes, it is the tree of life. That scripture has been on my heart the past couple days – I am seeing the tree of life in my own life.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
But when the desire comes, it is a tree of life.
For a life time my hope was deferred, put aside for a later time. Each time I went the extra mile and was then rejected my hope was disappointed. They did not know what they were doing, I pray. They did not know any better. I feel sad for them, now.
I learned, after my salvation, that there were promises. Being shy about expecting promises to be honored it took me these many seven years to get this revelation!
The tree of life and it’s fruits were always for us. However, we had to earn the fruit, the understanding, without the mind of Christ we would spoil the truth. Heck, the human race is spoiling it even now. Yet, it is still ours, but only through relationship with the Father through the Son!
He promised me a garment of Praise for mourning. Today, August 1,2008…
I have recieved that garment. It is light weight and allows me to stand taller with my head held high (my sensation of being taller).
He promised me beauty for ashes! Today, August 1, 2008…
I have recieved my beauty. It washes over me, even now. Waves of comfort and peace…Serenity, real Serenity.
The chains I have been bound to, the slavery to a wanton desire for acceptance has been fulfilled by God the Father. I am free of this thing.
I Look up today, as in Psalm 121, knowing who my Savior is. I thank Him for the price He paid for me and sing these psalms to Him alone. He asks that I leave this past behind me and I will humbly and in relief be obedient, finally to His soft urgings. I repent for my stubborness and ask His forgiveness and feel as I write this tiny prayer testimony that forgiveness extended.
I am blessed that my Father answers me immediately. I wait to see the blessings that are provided within me and my family from this kind act of God. I look forward to, though with some guard, to the new relationships with my family. It really is none of my concern how they choose to react to these changes in me. Though I do not truly understand that concept as reality, yet. I know that God will reveal that when the time comes. Until then I will continue to Look up and do the next right thing. This is what freedom feels like!