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How God Assures Me He’s On It :: A Much Needed Sunday Healing


Sweet, Sad Eyed Boy

Sweet, Sad Eyed Boy

This is my sweet boy. My youngest. My sad little guy. And OH how he had reason for that sweet, sad look. And OH how I sometimes, still, ache for my blindness.

The Man

The Man

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is the man… angry and battling his demons. Very scary demons. And OH how I dreamed of reaching that sweet boy who was hidden in that angry man. I was incapable of reaching into him, to the boy. He wouldn’t let me. I wasn’t, still am not allowed to even hug him. It’s truly heartbreaking for me. And I’m sure his heart is broken. But He battles daily with his illness, his addiction. Heroin. And even when he stumbles, slips and falls flat out; he gets back up to battle. He’s superman in his head. He still thinks he needs to be I think. Because, I couldn’t protect him, because he couldn’t tell me … until they did, when they were barely in grade school … and the man (teen) you see above hid the sweet boy. Seemingly forever.

He fell this week. Wasn’t able to recover from an apparent stumble and now he starts over again. And my heart is broken watching him be sick. Very sick as he starts to stand back up to this illness, this craving, whose whole intent is to kill that sweet boy he has hidden in his heart.

Shane light editThis is him at the beginning of the last run of sobriety. Tired but strong. He’ll be there again.

And I know this because God and I met in worship this morning at church. I started the day very worried about my sweet boy, who hasn’t been so sweet these last few days. He was sick and in pain and irritable. I mean who wouldn’t be when they felt sick; I certainly am not fun when I am ill. But this is different.

There’s nothing I can do. And if I do something I am jeopardizing his life by enabling him. He has to walk out the withdrawl himself. He has to want to feel better. He has to choose between sobriety  and oblivion.

Unlike the cancer his father battles, the boy chose his illness. Chose oblivion over the demons of something he had no say in and I had no knowledge of. The demons who continue to tell him it was his fault. The demons that tell him I should have known. The demons who tell him he’s superman and he can live through the dangerous choices. The demons who tell him no one loves him because he’s unlovable now. This monster heroin quiets the demons I imagine. But then they begin to rustle again and bite … I cannot fathom the pain, though I experience his pain and suffering while he battles the withdrawl and fights for the breath of air that sobriety brings him.

As I sang praises to God today. As I worshiped the Father that promises to heal us. I cried out and from the depth of this mother’s heart and soul I sought my God’s assistance for my sweet boy. And God assured me that with that relinquishing, once again, of my boy to His care, that the boy, the man, would be healed.

During this song, as the lead singer of our worship band and assistance pastor sang this favorite, God met me in my aching for my sweet boy. I quieted and prayed for him and for The Hubs and was assured that He had them, that their healings were imminent, promised. And I quieted into the precious peace of the music, in Father’s presence.

You see, I’ve realized that the enemy has put a hit out on this family. Two of my men are battling grave illnesses, and the boy does not know the promises we believe! So I, WE, as a family must believe for him. He does not know that heroin addiction cannot kill him, as his father knows the cancer cannot kill him, though we tell him.

The boy does not know, as the father does, that because we believe, he is saved from his illnesses and cleansed of his sins, sins that are not even his own, but believes to be. The boy doesn’t believe that Jesus loved him so much that he took the heroin needle for him to the cross and died there with that illness upon Him! So we must believe and pray until the boy understands his worth to the Father.

And what mother, father and brother wouldn’t do this for a boy, for a man?

Oh how I wish the boy believed that he would live. Oh how I wish the boy believed he is loved beyond his mother’s ability to put it in words. Oh how I wish he knew the joy I get when he is well and smiles and is a participating member of this family. A participating member in his own life.

So I leave this post as another prayer to God. It holds no scripture, only a song of worship and praise to our Father God expressing my love and honor to him. I leave it as proof that I acknowledge His response to my need, my boy’s need, this morning. And I thank him again and again, without end that my sweet boy is starting to feel better and is two or three (I’m not sure) days back on the road of sobriety.

To every parent of a child who battles the illness of addiction, or any illness for that matter, I sing this song for you and your child. I pray that God vanquish this demon and send it to hell from whence it came, and I put the enemy and heroin under the feet of Jesus.

We are healed. Our children are healed. Our land is healed. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Thanks for listening to this outpouring of a mother’s heart.

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The sweet boy’s mom. =)


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Looking Up, Still …


OOOOoooo! Quick update-add on! This is my 500th blog post here at HopeAnnFaith! Whooop Whooop! smile

Five Minute Friday Time! Joining Kate and the FMF Writers for today’s prompt:

Turn.

 Follow the link in the graphic here to get the skinny on the FMF link-up and join us! We’d love to share this with you!

Now without any further delay … setting the timer …

 GoTurn your eyes upon Jesus and the things of this world will grow strangely dim.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. ~ Hebrews 12:1-2

Turn away from those things that hinder and so easily entangle. Those things and people of the world who do not agree with the written will of God for our lives. What do we do when the doctor in our lives say things like: “We can never tell you you will heal” or “The chemo didn’t work, so ….”?

Or even better, professionals dealing with patients saying things like: “Oh! You’ve been doing this a year! Aren’t you one for the history books?!” What kind of backhanded encouragement (?) is that? My first thought was lady, get yourself some bedside manners before you speak to a possibly frightened patient again! Appalling in and of itself. But saddening when you think that these people don’t know God and His promises of healing for all of us.

So, yeah. I schooled them in the facts of The Hubs progress and in how BIG our God is compared to their knowledge and protocol. I was polite but firm and basically told them how they could speak about this malady in reference to our lives. The doctor just shook her head like I was a poor unfortunate imbecile; but the nurse, she knew about God, she’d obviously had some church in her life, praise God! She apologized and thanked me for giving her a different view about how her patients might be dealing with cancer in their lives. My response was thank you and not everyone owns their illnesses, some of us refuse to allow an illness or disease to take hold within us. WE here in Hutchand DO NOT take ownership of anything that did not come from God!

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. ~ James 1:17

That’s just how we roll here in Hutchland, according to what God says about this life of ours. I’m not saying we got it down pat, we don’t. But when we get it wrong, the minute we realize it, usually at Holy Spirit’s correction, we pick up, dust ourselves off , repent and get back on that path called LIFE, God has set before us.

So where do you turn when things don’t seem correct in your day to day? Where do you look when the world tells you something upside down and inside out? Do you turn to Jesus? Do you look up? Join us and let us know where you turn.

stop

 

 

 

Psalm 121

A song of ascents.

I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
    where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
    the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip—
    he who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord watches over you—
    the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day,
    nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all harm—
    he will watch over your life;
the Lord will watch over your coming and going
    both now and forevermore.

Thank you for reading. =)

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Thursday Morning Praise … Let My Words Be Few Thursday!


A while ago, over a year, I tried to create my own blog link up. Few Words Thursday. But I didn’t have much of a following. That being the case I love the thought of that concept. A day of Few Words, just pressing into the presence of God. Being still and waiting on Him. I want to do that today, and maybe each Thursday, again. I want to create in quiet … honoring Him.

So here’s what I have for today. Join me if you want to, I’d love that. At first just share with me, in the comments, your best to God in the shortest and most concise manner: Words, Prayers, Poems, Worship or Praise video, pictures or however you need to express your desire to spend this little bit of time quietly, in the Lords healing arms. And when I am moved by God I will ‘reblog’ your offerings here, on Friday or Saturday, for others, like a guest blogger. =) Then if there’s enough response, I’ll create the link up.

But until then I’m going to spend my Thursday quietly with Father. And if the following doesn’t come, then I’ll know that this is my special time with God, alone, and I will post when I am moved to.

Blessings to YOU, my friendly readers.

 

Don’t make rash promises, and don’t be hasty in bringing matters before God. After all, God is in heaven, and you are here on earth. So let your words be few. Ecclesiastes 5:2

A Few Words Thursday @ HOPEannFAITH

A Few Words Thursday @ HOPEannFAITH

In my day to day I’ve learned to be quiet, at some point, and listen for God. Whether that moment is one of peaceful waiting or crisis,  I long to hear only from God. On my worst day, in the darkest shadows, I come to know, and expect, that God will speak and guide me in that time, whether it’s for hours or just a moment.

I expect and long to hear from God, alone, for He is GOD alone. So this morning I started with praise music entering into the expectation of His presence for today. There’s no immediate crisis, only the wide unknown in front of me as The Hubs and I wait for him to be accepted into some clinical trial or for the tests to show what we already know. That God has healed Him. I long for the doctors to tell us that The Hubs is healed, but they’ve almost vowed never to tell us that.

So instead of waiting on the doctors with this longing, I choose to wait on God to prove to them that He is the Healer! With that let me stop my words and praise Him.

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Thanks for reading and listening. If you’d join me, I’d love that. =) Leave it in the comments.


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Trust: Words that Move me to God Thoughts |Tuesday @ 10/ 31 Days of Writing


index2Here it is … Tuesday again and the 29th day of the 31 day writing challenge. I must say that near the middle the 31D challenge truly challenged me! I fell significantly behind; but Wheww! I’ve caught up!

Tuesday @ Ten

Tuesday @ Ten

 

 

Finding the Grace Within’s Karen Beth brought a really good prompt today! To join us in this blog link-up just follow the link in the picture to the left and get the skinny on how the link up works.

TRUST … Certain words and subjects bring me right to the subject of God in most conversations. Mainly because I’ve come to a place in my relationship with God that I know these subjects are His domain.

Trust is most definitely one of them.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;” Proverbs 3:5

We’ve all had our trust broken by people. Most of the people who break our trust are those closest to us, this wounds deeply and leaves inner scars that we hide and rarely heal. That is if we do not seek for them to heal. But when we finally do seek to heal from our inner wounds it is God who heals and rebuilds that trust; but not in man.

He teaches us that humans are fallible; incapable of the absolutes we seek in them. That absolute trust is only held true in God; simply because He is unchangable, unlike humans. People are easily swayed, their minds and opinions change with on each direction of the wind and with those changes come broken promises and vows and trust.

But God. He says …

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5

For some reason “our own understanding” is that a person, those we love and trust, are infallible. They are not. Like I said above they change, sometimes on the smallest of whims. We, too, are infallible; our word, promise and vows are just as fallible. I would find it suspect, at best, if there were anyone reading who hasn’t broken someones trust; purposefully and with intent or not, we’ve caused someone, somewhere not to trust us. And you and I both know regaining that trust takes a lifetime.

Again. But God. He says …

Forgive as I have forgiven you. We must …

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

And know we embark on the “but!!!” … How do I forgive some of the most heinous wounds? Well to be perfectly honest in and of myself I know that I am incapable of that! I’m almost 50 and I spent way too much of my life harboring deep resentments and wrath against those who harmed me. And that harm was SOUL DEEP. Permanent scars, or so I thought! When I came to the realization that I had to forgive I was far beyond mad. It incited rage within me! I felt forsaken, by those who had hurt me; the very people who were supposed to care for and protect me and now … yes, I felt forsaken by God!

In all that time of tragedy, abuse and neglect I had never felt forsaken by God, but realizing that I had to forgive shattered trust … well I was beside myself. And I say that because I was a participating Christian when the revelation came and I didn’t have a clue how I could continue in a faith that required the impossible for me.

But God. Here I am explaining it to you, my friendly readers.

Trustworthiness is a characteristic that is in The Image of God. An integrity we gain through our walk with God. We are taught honesty by our natural parents; but it is usually their version of honesty. And inevitable they are the first persons who break our faith in the human race. Luckily God made it them who we could forgive because of our lifelong relationship with them … our first lesson in forgiveness. =) God is so amazing, knowing who to sacrifice so that each of us could come into our true being as His children.

It took me a very long time to forgive my shattered trust. That brokenness that caused me to guard my heart against just about everyone in my life. For me, as for many, it was truly a self preservation thing. A lonely road, really.

I relearned trust in my honest seeking of God and His kingdom. These verses, when applied to my life gave me a new perspective on trust, and how to trust others.

I can now trust others because I put my trust first in God the Father. I’ve learned to trust God that He works in anyone around me, whether it is their true nature or not, so that I am safe and protected. Man cannot break my Trust anymore, because it is based on the only Man in my life capable of absolute honesty … Jesus.

So here are a LOT of scriptures for you to get into your heart, so that when the subject of trust comes up in your life you too can be sure of where your trust comes from. Secure in the fact that God’s Word is true and faithful even when those we love the most cannot be.

Do you need to repair broken trust in your life. Is there a relationship that you need to repair when it come to Trust and Honesty? I encourage you to get into the Word of God and press into your relationship with God the Father and trust will follow!

And … YES. You have an existing relationship with God, even if you aren’t aware or sure of it. Father God is just waiting on you to reconcile yourself to His Love … because Jesus already reconciled You to Father. Jesus did the work … you just need to lean in and accept and TRUST that UNCONDITIONAL Love!

These scripture are the start to getting Trust into perspective in your life. They work for me. I pray them. They helped me learn to trust people THROUGH God and now they help me to stay in contact with God first when trust becomes an issue in my life. And …

I always … Remember – Trust God First!

Joshua 1:9 Have not I commanded you? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be you dismayed: for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.
2 Samuel 7:28 And now, O Lord GOD, you are that God, and your words be true, and you have promised this goodness to your servant:
Psalms 9:10 And they that know your name will put their trust in you: for you, LORD, have not forsaken them that seek you.
Psalms 13:5 But I have trusted in your mercy; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
Psalms 20:7 Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the LORD our God.
Psalms 31:14 But I trusted in you, O LORD: I said, You are my God.
Psalms 56:3 What time I am afraid, I will trust in you.
Psalms 84:12 O LORD of hosts, blessed is the man that trusts in you.
Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not to your own understanding.
Proverbs 11:13 A talebearer reveals secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit conceals the matter.
Proverbs 11:28 He that trusts in his riches shall fall; but the righteous shall flourish as a branch.
Proverbs 28:26 He that trusts in his own heart is a fool: but whoever walks wisely, he shall be delivered.
Isaiah 12:2 Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and not be afraid: for the LORD JEHOVAH is my strength and my song; he also is become my salvation.
Isaiah 43:1 But now thus said the LORD that created you, O Jacob, and he that formed you, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed you, I have called you by your name; you are mine.
Jeremiah 7:8 Behold, you trust in lying words, that cannot profit.
Daniel 6:23 Then was the king exceedingly glad for him, and commanded that they should take Daniel up out of the den. So Daniel was taken up out of the den, and no manner of hurt was found on him, because he believed in his God.
John 14:1 Let not your heart be troubled: you believe in God, believe also in me.
Romans 15:13 Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.
Revelation 21:5 And he that sat on the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said to me, Write: for these words are true and faithful.
Thank you for reading.
Andrea

Andrea

31 Days Journey to Healing

31 Days Journey to Healing

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Memory Verses for Prayer and Healing | Day27:31Days


Memory Verses

Memory Verses

Throughout my walk with God and in The Faith I’ve loved the scripture verse, John 14:20 . The Comforter, even the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said unto you.

It’s comforting to know that Father God sent to us, even after the sacrifice of His Son, someone to guide us and remind us about what God says about life here on earth. The Holy Spirit is sent to comfort us with reminders that no matter what, God said this.

That was the basic sermon of our Sunday service this last Sunday! Learning not to be deceived by what others say, write or instruct. All those things are wonderful and very often someone’s testimony; but is it what God is saying to me today? Or was it for that person and simply meant to be a testimony for us to learn to turn to God’s word for our instruction, blessings and promises?

Those books, those testimonies are to draw us into God … not the person who shared the testimony! I am not going to get closer to God or His plan for me by hanging on to your testimony. Your testimony, my testimony is to show the work of God through me … How He changes the world USING me, His lowly daughter … just plain Andrea.

My testimony should direct you to Him and His Word. Why read my blog and forgo God’s Word. If you read anything past this sentence today please let it be God’s Word on your situation! That  said …

I follow this particular advise I’m giving you today. I turn to God’s Word, I memorize scripture that is Him speaking directly to and about my current situations.

YES! A 2014 year old book speaks directly to my circumstances today! And I’ve studied enough that when I hear a word or conversation it brings scripture to my remembrance.

My experience with God on that ER gurney 5 years ago started with a scripture rising up in my spinning head. Ezekiel 36:26

“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.”

God spoke to me, as if in a dream-state, within the context of that scripture. Now, yes, I enjoy God actually speaking to me directly. I garnered this privilege by being one of His most stubborn and thickheaded daughters. I also believe I received this privilege because when I had my first encounter with Him I was young and need the tangible voice. I feel truly blessed by this particular level of intimacy with the Father; while I know that for some it is disturbing or seems untrue, I assure you it is neither.

The Holy Spirit will bring to our remembrance what we’ve put in … I encourage you today to use God’s Words, those verses that speak to you, open up within you, when your read them. That opening or expanding sensation you get when God speaks to you through His Word is revelation and knowledge and wisdom … one or any combination therein.

It feels alive to me. And that’s because the Word is alive, a living representation of God’s love for us! So as a starter, to assist in the healing of any area or ailment in your life here are a few amazing healing verses for you to start with. I firmly encourage you to take these verses and read them in your bible. If you don’t own a bible yet go to Biblegate.com and start to read there. You can use any version you like and you can even have it read it to you!

 

Memory Verses for Healing –

Read these, Pray these back to Father … He will respond directly to you! Keep them in your Remembrance and Holy Spirit will send them when you are in need of them!

John 4:4 {Greater is He…}

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.

Isaiah 53:5 { By His stripes we were healed … note the “were”}

But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed.

Psalm 118:17 {The original Speak Life verse!}

I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the LORD has done.

and one more for now …

Luke 5:17 {The power of the Lord is present to heal YOU!}

One day He was teaching; and there were some Pharisees and teachers of the law sitting there, who had come from every village of Galilee and Judea and from Jerusalem; and the power of the Lord was present for Him to perform healing.

I encourage you, go now and read these scriptures and the whole story around them … write them down and repeat them when you are feeling the ill effects of the ailment that pains you. Let the understanding wash over you … like in this last one: it so powerfully opens up the truth for me!

THE POWER OF THE LORD IS PRESENT TO HEAL!

I know, it’s my revelation knowledge, but I can promise you it’s my knowledge that God is with me right now, present and healing because I did what I am encouraging you to do right now. I felt pain, I ran to the Word and read what God said … and there is no where in the bible, that I’ve found, where it says that God was present in my illness. The Word only says He is present, He is willing, He is speaking, MY HEALING.

Make this Yours today! Blessing to you and thank you for reading.

 

 

Thank You for Reading. Andrea

Thank You for Reading.
Andrea

31 Days Journey to Healing

31 Days Journey to Healing

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Prayer Changes Everything! | day 22 of 31


Prayer Changes Everything

Prayer Changes Everything

Yes, yes it does. Prayer changes minds, lives and situations. It changes one’s health, we actually get healthier when communing, communicating with God the Father.

Because … Prayer changes our minds! We literally begin to think differently about everything.

Why? Because when we pray to the Father of the Universe we come into His presence and are caught up in the enormity of Who He is and His LOVE for us and we begin to believe the truth of our situation.

Like some of us felt about our parents when we were younger.

Don’t get me wrong, I know not everyone had a secure parent/child relationship … I didn’t, however … God fixed that in me as early as 5 years old.

My childhood was a, let’s say, rough one. My dad was gone, well worse … he was voluntarily absent and my mom was ill. When I say my childhood it is more of a reference to a time or age in my life. I didn’t really have a childhood.

No, I’m not looking for sympathy; it’s just a fact of my life. One that others may need to know to be able to continue with what I am saying in this post.

When I was 5 some of the more traumatic events of my childhood occurred. My dad left when I was four … but I don’t really know how close to 5 I was at the time, and mom was sick and angry and sad and not taking care of herself, or us kids, very well.

I don’t remember what was going on specifically at the time, but that’s because what I experienced during the situation was so much more dynamic than the trouble that precipitated my amazing experience with Jesus.

We were sent outside to “play”, this was normal for most families at that time … it was 1970. But I didn’t play …. I grabbed my favorite pillow and a book before I was ushered out and the door was closed behind me. I went to our huge maple in the middle of the front yard and was reading (???) it had to be a children’s picture book, I was only 5! and at some point I fell asleep ….

Sometime later minutes, hours (?) I don’t know I was awakened to a very bright light and when I opened my eyes I saw feet in gold sandals and the hem of a white dress (that was my take on it) with blue trim and I heard a booming voice. I remember feeling funny, like a floaty feeling, but no fear or anxiety. I looked up into the light and heard him say …

“You won’t hurt any further. They cannot hurt you anymore.” Just that and a feeling of peace and comfort.

I tell you all this to tell you that this was the beginning of healing for me. I would not be where I am today; I would not be mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy if God had not revealed Himself to that child I was. Over many, many years of running and hurting I never forgot that visitation. Even when my faith or my religion, which was not being fed in any way, I still prayed to this God, this Jesus (I did know it was Jesus) in my times of desperation.

He wasn’t done … He visited me again when I was 19 in a very tragic, life altering situation. And that visitation cemented me in my belief that there was a God and He knew who I was, though cement or not I continued to run amok for another 18 years, praying to Him when I was at my wits end!

All that praying … it changed me. Little by little it made me stronger, it drew me closer to Him and this path He has me on.

You see I had to do and experience all of that life and lack therein to come to this place where I can tell you that praying can heal you, if you let it!

I encourage you. Don’t let the circumstances of your life stop your relationship with God. As hard as some of  life is, as the tragedy and trauma feel as though they are molding us; trust me when I tell you it is God molding us, in spite of those circumstances, those worldly realities; into the amazing sons and daughters He loves so very much. Keep talking to father, keep sharing your heart and your hurts. Keep communing, communicating with Him; it will change your world. I promise.

I pray today that this post, that once again feels disjointed, is understandable to those who need it. That we all will continue to pray and communicate with God the Father and receive the enormous love and purpose He has for us! In Jesus name, I pray that we will shed the religion and press into the relationship of child to father and bask in the vision He has for us. That we can shed the world and embrace heaven the way that He originally planned for us. Amen.

Thank You for Reading. Andrea

Thank You for Reading.
Andrea

 

31 Days Journey to Healing

31 Days Journey to Healing

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…delighting myself in the Lord…


We had Praise and Prayer Friday at our church this evening, and it was good.

Lately I have been battling something … someone … me, and I didn’t know why. I still don’t, except to know that it is a hormonal thing.

But, Jesus died for that! So why?

Because I gave in to the overwhelming deluge of hormonal waves? Easy I guess as one does not actually feel this physically, it’s more of an emotional physical occurence, I guess.

All things positive in my spirit seemed to have been arrested. Strange, because outwardly nothing happened, all things were good; a status quo. Life was rolling smoothly and steadily along. Yet, there I was with a sense of foreboding, emptiness and angst.

Not the usual “little ball of sunshine” as my husband teases! Not myself.

Usually by Friday I am done. Looking forward to a Saturday with my hubby, hopefully, or at the very least a day that is not consumed by the needs of others and the world at large. So having to go out on a Friday night does not usually cause me to be joyful.

However, tonight, I was looking forward to Prayer Friday. No, more like EXPECTING GodI was entirely prepared, having done my level best to be prayed up and in; to be released from this overwhelming emotional upheaval of this week.

God was faithful!

The music that we began prayer with was not to my usual taste, however, it was calm and flowed like the warm waves of a calm ocean on a breezy summer night. I began to feel the Holy Spirit wash over me, caressing my spirit, soothing my mind.

Our Pastor Scott lead us to leave our cares of the week and day behind us and follow the Holy Spirit to the throne of God, blessedly I felt this and entered in.

Then our Pastor Santhosh lead us to this scripture …

Psalm 37:3-4

3 Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
4 Take delight in the LORD,
   and he will give you the desires of your heart.

And there it was … my solution. Dwell in the land and enjoy safe pature…Take delight in the LORD.

I was not dwelling in the Kingdom!

I was no longer enjoying the safety of the pasture.

I had ceased to delight [myself] in the LORD!

You see we do this to ourselves! While indulging in the ravaged, hormonal and emotional upheaval my body told me I couldn’t do anything about, I wandered from the path of Peace, Love and Delight.

David delighted in the LORD during some really bad times! Lions, Giants and Wars, O’my! So why can’t I?

The bible says that God inhabits the Praise of His people! I was praying, but all of my, other, usual routines were passed by with the attitude of “I don’t care”, “I don’t feel like it” and “I can’t”.

I was ignoring devotionals and I was not praising God. All things I know to be vital to my personal spirituality. My relationship with God hinges on these things, it’s how I spend intimate time in the LORD.

I wasn’t doing the things I knew to do. I was actually avoiding them! Talk about a back slide!

Ah, my natural character defect; my worst enemy, me, got loose and decided a week of frustrated depression was in order! And the spiral to hell and hellish behavior began.

Then God …

In all His love and faithfulness He remained by my side to teach me something. Seriously, He must have thought…Child if you’re going here anyway…

Let me teach you Quietude…

Quietude or Serenity … though it did not begin serenely, I remained oddly quiet. Throwing some of my closest friends and loved ones.

Quiet is not a description anyone who knows me would use! 🙂

I guess God decided if I was not going to Praise Him, if I would not delight in Him, He would teach me quiet.

I can’t say it was a good time, or that it was true Quietude. It wasn’t peaceful, but it was oddly calm, like before a storm. And the storm did come, this was a physical occurrence, after all. But I was quiet, though I could not hear God or sense Him physically (I enjoy both the audible and physicality of God) I knew He was there.

He does not leave or forsake us, thank goodness.

Now, exhausted from the emotions and angst of this week, I feel released from it all. I have been forgiven my rebellious nature, as always, and I write this to guide, to teach, to share in what I learned.

Pray through…

Praise through…

Ignor the feelings of NO feelings. He is there and He will lead, you just continue to move forward, speaking the Word…doing the Word, until you willingly return to the path of Peace, Love and Delight; all the things God is, and none of the things we are without Him.

How are you? What do you do to return to the path of Peace, Love and Delight in the LORD?

What scriptures or songs lead you back Home to Daddy’s throne room?

I’m going there now, why don’t you read the Book or play that love song to God that you love so much and join me. I would love to share this release with you.

Blessings Love ♥